We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Randomize
