i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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