beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize