I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
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