my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
