Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
