he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
