we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
