i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize
