Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize