i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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