There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
