Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
Randomize
