Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize