I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize