think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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