its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Randomize
