And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
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