that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I just forgot I was standing up.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
