i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
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