wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
