He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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