is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
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