Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize