whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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