That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
