Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Randomize
