sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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