they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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