3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
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