so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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