i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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