her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
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