Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Randomize
