U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
I came so hard my ears popped.
Randomize
