so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I supernannyed him into submission
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