Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize
