ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
