ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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