I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
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