He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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