And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
