Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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