Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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