I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
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