I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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