Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
not ubering you a puppy
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
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