saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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