just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
