i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Randomize
